hot take: shows like brooklyn nine-nine and superstore are popular among millenials bc they are produced and written like a disney sitcom from 2004-2012 but for adults
So i just watched the season finale of The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and i couldnt help but notice a few things about Dr. Cerberus. And now i have a bit of a reach, yet so obvious its staring you in the face and waving its hands in the air theory. My evidence;
Hilda asked him if he was the first born of his family and he said the first of three brothers
The whole glowy yellow eyes thing
The show’s affinity for traditional Catholic references (Cain, Lilith, idk Satan himself)
All of these have led me to believe that Dr Cerberus is actually Cerberus. At least one of his heads. Think about it. Three heads, three brothers. Yellow/amber eyes, trademark of hellbeasts. And for all of y'all who aren’t familiar with Dante’s Inferno, Dante incorporates Cerberus in Catholic hell to punish the gluttonous sinners, making him a somewhat relevant hell figure. That’s my theory. Feel free to hit me with a rebuke, id love to see some other theories.
So… Madam Satan’s worried that Sabrina could be a potential suitor for the Dark Lord. Hmm.
Nick Scratch was the first person at evil Hogwarts to show any interest in Sabrina, and was immediately positive.
Nick Scratch shares a common name that Satan takes when he’s on earth.
Nick Scratch ignores all the standard etiquette rules that all the other young witches seem to follow, manifesting a level of freedom that no-one else seems to posses.
Nick Scratch goes out of his way to protect Sabrina from the Weird Sisters when he has nothing (obvious) to gain from it.
Nick Scratch obviously is very into Sabrina, but WON’T make the first move.
Nick Scratch is ALWAYS in the right place at the right time, giving Sabrina hints and help whenever she needs it.
Nick Scratch protected Harvey and his father through the storm because he wanted to please Sabrina. His obvious jealousy for Harvey didn’t get in his way, and he put everything he had into the defence.
What I’m saying is that the evidence is mounting that Nick Scratch is in fact the Dark Lord, and has decided to try to get Sabrina’s heart willingly. Satan may well be smitten.
Of course all this relies on one crucial question: Can the Dark Lord manifest in two places at once? Because while Nick was protecting Harvey… the Beast was helping Sabrina add her name to his book…hmm.
So I binged watched all of The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina and after a tiny bit of sleep I shot upright in bed like I slam dunked back into my body because I have a theory y’all.
What if Sabrina Spellman isn’t ‘Sabrina’ Spellman?
Here me out.
Edward, Sabrina’s father, is shown to be the most clever and powerful warlock in the history of the coven. He is a smart man adept at many arts and well versed in witch law. He was so educated in it that he taught a mortal lawyer how to beat the devil.
Episode two exclusively focuses on this mortal lawyer while exposing four other key facts; that the church of witches and the devil are subject to a set of laws, there are loopholes in those laws, Edward promised a child to the devil, and Edward kept secrets.
Then take into consideration how focused the plot of part one is on Sabrina’s signature. She has to sign her name in the Book of the Beast of her own free will. Edward knew this and even expressed to Sabrina’s aunties how it was his wish that Sabrina sign her name.
Now in later episodes we learn that Edward was progressive beyond his marriage to a mortal. In episode seven we learn he stopped the tradition of Feast of Feasts. He fought against the expectations of the church and the devil for more humane practices.
So take that odd contradiction: Edward wanted to change the church and disagreed with the devil and yet wanted Sabrina to submit to the church and the devil. Seems weird right?
It’s because he didn’t want Sabrina to be part of the church and belong to the devil. However his marriage to Diane was only allowed if he promised Sabrina to the devil which we also learn in episode 2.
It’s also worth noting here that the devil is not omnipresent and omniscient. This is clear by his need of others to accomplish his will and how in the trial of episode 2 it comes to light that Sabrina Spellman was baptized and promised to God first. If the devil was all seeing and all knowing he would have have already known about the baptism and he wouldn’t have left Sabrina’s dark baptism in the hands of less knowledgeable creatures like Lilith.
So, knowing that Edward was brilliant and well versed in witch law, that he agreed to a deal with the devil that he didn’t want to fulfill, and that the devil is not privy to all knowledge: what if Sabrina Spellman is a twin and not actually the the one legally named Sabrina?
If Edward and Diane had twins, they could hide one after naming her Sabrina then call the baby they present to the coven by that same name without it actually being her name. This would then create a loophole. Sabrina Spellman signed that name into the Book of the Beast and since neither her nor the devil know it’s not really her name she is still granted the contract and when she finds out the truth of who she is she’ll still have the power to defeat the devil and the legal out from her expected servitude.
Other things that support this?
Sabrina sees two babies in the suitcase in the woods in her vision (I think episode 1 but I might be jumbled on that). At first glance it’s a symbol of her duality as witch and mortal since one of the babies has goat features but what if it’s also her seeing that she is part of a set of twins one of which is promised to the devil and that’s why she has goat features?
Also: the Blackwood twins. The show gives us an instance where the birth of twins has been concealed by Zelda simply by spiriting away one of the children after birth. This is done to save the girl from her perceived fate. When Zelda shows Hilda the child later she adds that they’ll raise the child and they’ve “done it before.” This is of course in reference to raising Sabrina but it could also be foreshadowing that the concealment of twins was also done before with Sabrina.
Anyway just a theory but like groundwork is definitely there for it if they go that way.
Hi everyone!! I haven’t made a post like this literally in 3 years because I have been doing okay financially. My transition was kickstarted thanks to a GoFundMe I did and I have been holding myself down ever since. Going into 2019, I am determined to implement the surgical alleviation of my dysphoria into my life, but I need y’alls help.
Please consider reblogging/donating to my GoFundMe, because I cannot do this alone. You have no idea how happy it would make me to see the changes I need to have in order to feel 100% unified mind, body, and soul.
If you don’t like GoFundMe posts you can unfollow because I will be reposting this until I reach my goal.
If your straight guy friend says that he supports gays, tell him that you thought he was gay when you first met him. See how fast he gets upset and insecure & starts asking you why you thought that.
My gay guy friend tried this to our straight friend and the response he got was “thought? More like hoped” and then he winked. That’s a real ally right there.
He really just scalped your poor gay friend on the spot didn’t he lmfao
I tried this on a straight friend and he turned bright red and mumbled something about how he might be bisexual actually? so I introduced him to some of the other queer folks I know and flash forward 4 months he’s definitely bi and out to all of our friends and dating a guy on his intramural kickball team.
